A nurse claims her husband killed himself after ‘losing hope’ when his corrective eye surgery allegedly left him with dry eyes and blurry vision.
Denise Phillips, 46, from Worcester, had been with electrician Paul Dance, 62, for more than 18 years and they had a 16-year-old son together.
Paul hated wearing glasses and paid £6,990 to have new lenses surgically put into his eyes in January, but was left distraught after learning that a deterioration in his vision would require a second operation.
In five suicide notes left in his car for Denise, their son, his children from an earlier marriage and his sister, he made it clear he regretted having the eye surgery and feared having to live out his life without his sight.
Denise Phillips, 46, from Worcester, had been with electrician Paul Dance, 62, for more than 18 years and they had a 16-year-old son together (pictured). She claims her husband killed himself after ‘losing hope’ when his corrective eye surgery allegedly left him with dry eyes and blurry vision
He also spoke of his despair after a member of the medical team allegedly reportedly failed to phone him back to discuss his options. Paul was found dead at Worcestershire Royal Hospital, where he worked, on July 4.
He asked that Denise make the circumstances of his death public in the hope that others would think about the risks before they signed up for eye surgery just because they hated wearing glasses or contact lenses.
Denise said: ‘Paul wasn’t just my partner, we were best friends, and he was my whole world. I feel sometimes I can’t live without him.
‘Every morning when I wake up, I have to face it again that I have lost him and it breaks my heart.
Paul, pictured with Denise, was found dead at Worcestershire Royal Hospital, where he worked, on July 4
‘I won’t have it when people say that suicide is cowardly. I think it takes a lot of courage to do what Paul did.
‘I wish with all my heart that he hadn’t done it, but having decided that he couldn’t go on, I suspect he feared he’d become a burden to his family. It would have taken real courage to give up on his life when he was so loved.’
She added that she felt annoyed with herself, as a trained nurse, for failing to spot how low his mood had become.
‘His vision was fine, but like lots of people who see the adverts and the celebrity endorsements, he wanted to be free of glasses as he hated wearing them,’ Denise went on.
Paul, pictured with Denise, hated wearing glasses and paid £6,990 to have new lenses surgically put into his eyes in January, but was left distraught after learning that a deterioration in his vision would require a second operation
‘Paul paid almost £7,000 to have new lenses in his eyes, thinking it would transform his life. It did, but not in the way he thought.
‘He became increasingly distraught as his vision and the general state of his eyes got worse, with haloes and glare so bad he could not drive at night, and he lost hope.’
Denise said Paul’s notes on his phone underlined his increasing distress. One read: ‘Why did I do it? I had everything, beautiful wife who I adore, beautiful sons and daughter and grandkids, but I know I’m going to drag them down with my despair.
‘I’m so livid. I f***** my life for a pair of glasses.’
When Paul failed to return from work on July 4, Denise asked their son to use his ‘find my phone’ app and they discovered his phone was still at the hospital.
Denise said Paul’s five suicide notes on his phone underlined his increasing distress. Pictured with dog Flo
Denise claimed Paul became increasingly distraught as his vision and the general state of his eyes got worse, with haloes and glare so bad he could not drive at night, and he ‘lost hope’
Soon after she raised the alarm, Paul was found dead in the plant room at the top of the building.
In his farewell notes, he asked forgiveness from his loved ones, expressed regret for having done what he now considered ‘a stupid thing’ by having the surgery and wished them future happiness.
Devastated Denise insisted his action took courage. She also expressed anger at the company that carried out the eye operations, costing £6,990, six days apart in January.
This week she will tell the coroner she believes Paul’s despair was the result of confusion as two surgeons favoured different solutions to restore his vision, and that he became more distraught after he failed to receive a call he was expecting.
Devastated Denise insisted Paul’s action took courage. She also expressed anger at the company that carried out the eye operations, costing £6,990, six days apart in January
It is understood that the choice her partner faced was to heed the advice of the first surgeon and replace the multi-focal lenses he had implanted with mono-focal lenses, or to have YAG-laser treatment to try to remove opacity in his vision.
On June 24, Paul met the surgeon who had taken over his care and who favoured the YAG option.
Denise claimed Paul left the meeting confused, especially as neither of the procedures under discussion was guaranteed to leave him free of glasses, and called next day hoping to speak again to his new surgeon.
She said he had expected a call back in the days that followed, but it never came. In notes she found on his phone, he said: ‘[The company] was supposed to phone me but did not. What am I supposed to do? I think I’m going insane. I’ve got to end it. I’m so sorry.’
This week Denise will tell the coroner she believes Paul’s despair was the result of confusion as two surgeons favoured different solutions to restore his vision, and that he became more distraught after he did not receive a call he was expecting
Denise, pictured with her son, said she ‘had’ to make Paul’s story public because he asked her to. She said: ‘I feel that if one person reads it and decides not to risk going through what Paul did, his death will not have been in vain’
Campaigner Sasha Rodoy said it is more common than one might think to suffer from eye surgery. She is campaigning for further regulation in the industry. Pictured: flowers from Paul’s funeral
Denise explained: ‘He left that meeting distraught because he didn’t know what to do and feared he might go blind. He had lost hope, felt abandoned and couldn’t face life anymore.’
She added: ‘I have to make this public because he asked me to. I feel that if one person reads it and decides not to risk going through what Paul did, his death will not have been in vain.’
Denise has been supported by Sasha Rodoy, who runs the My Beautiful Eyes Foundation and acts as a patient-advocate for those who have concerns over refractive eye surgery.
She said: ‘Sasha has been an immense help. I wouldn’t have known what to do had I not found her with an online search.’
David Reid, Senior Coroner for Worcestershire, will conduct the inquest on December 2 at Stourport-on-Severn.
A spokesperson for the company said: ‘We are extremely saddened by Mr Dance’s death and offer our sincere condolences to the family.
‘As the inquest is ongoing, it is not appropriate for us to comment at this time and, as required, we will support the coroner with any procedures or requests he has.’
Just two years ago a US TV presenter killed herself after she too struggled with the side effects of corrective eye surgery.
Fox weather presenter, Jessica Starr, 35, a married mother-of-two, took her own life less than nine weeks after she had laser eye surgery.
Her family say they are convinced that complications from the surgery drove her to suicide.
For confidential support call Samaritans on 116 123 or visit samaritans.org